oh, hello everyone.

so take a picture.

2010-10-21T00:59:00.003+10:00

people often resort to taking pictures to store and freeze good memories, so they don't get lost somewhere in our tiny brain as we make way for more.. so that during one of those gloomy days, when you need a bit of a mood lift, you can always crawl back to these memories that colour you life.. that define you.

this feels surreal. today feels surreal. i was meant to send in my thesis (which btw is still a piece of crap as for now..) today at 4pm sharp but i got an extension. and i don't know why, somehow, when time usually pass you by so quickly during those rush hours, it just does not this time around. like, i could still be out surveying for hiking packs in Toowong today when i freaking need to just wrap myself in a blanket to get the writing done. but i could, and time is still around, weirdly.

i am not complaining, don't get me wrong. my point is, as surprised as i am to how merciful time is treating me this time around, i am cherishing every bit of it. this year has been such a BIG thing, with the koala conservation that i have been intensely involved with. it opens doors, it channels many wonders for my mind to feast on. and ya Allah, i just want you to know that i have never been more grateful, ever, in my life with the opportunities that You have showered on me this year. it all comes down to this one last week, and how i wish it doesn't end.

i don't know what exactly am i writing about. maybe this is a letter to God, to thank Him. for the wealth in knowledge and possibilities He bestow upon me, and for the time He spare for me when i need it. i mean, come on... i really am putting my procrastinator mask on at this very moment to show how much time i have left before the thesis is due next week.

so go on, take a picture of your favourite days.

frame it in your mind anyway there is, coz moments like this are just too sad to be forgotten. and as for myself, this blog is my picture :)

have a good week!

paid your tribute?

2010-10-07T17:03:00.004+10:00

sean came back from the field bringing a bag full of shattered body parts of a koala he found killed by the freeway. i dropped by his room to have a look, and could barely see the head. the nails from her claws looked chipped. and the smell was horrible.....

bloody urbanization.

Eid 2010

2010-09-13T11:17:00.003+10:00

i consider myself as a weeper on most sad occasions.

i cry when my cat falls sick, i even cry when my shoes gone missing.

but somehow, not this raya... and even the last four rayas i've spent away from my family, surprisingly.

maybe it's just me who hate sounding all sad to the echoing sound of takbir and thus make my parents even sadder, or me not attending to the sad emotions, or maybe im not sad at all. hehe.

but i do miss this routine thou.. seeking for my parents' forgiveness on Eid morning!

so this year marks my last year celebrating Eid abroad.

eventhough i've starting not believing in spending money for new fancy baju raya since years ago, i was still excited more than anything.

i'd say this raya was equivalent to a celebration of both friendship and... food (duhhh). everyone was neither short of laughters nor lemangs, nor rendang nor impit, nor kuah kacang nor laksa itu ini, nor satay nor every-food-you-can-possibly-imagine-on-pagi-raya-in-Malaysia.

ok im getting carried away with the food.... :D

sad to think that this raya with friends ends here, but please, hell to the YES for going back to raya at Malaysia!

so here am I wishing everyone a very joyful & blessed Eid Mubarak wherever you are.

and if you're far away from home, please wipe your tears and immerse your whole existence in food ok?

Salam from Brisbane, Australia.

hulaaa!

2010-09-06T18:47:00.003+10:00

River Fire Brisbane 2010 from Vanessa & Damien's balcony

have you been celebrating life? :)

my first attempt at capturing fireworks. kalau compare dgn pro mmg menangis la, but i think i did ok for someone who knows so little about manipulating long exposure component in the dslr. i coupled that lack of practicality with my common sense on how light travels, and apparently that works too. haha.

roasted zoology 16

2010-08-31T19:05:00.002+10:00

Since I'm still in my whale-obsessed mode..... :)

Humpback whales Megaptera novaeangliae are mammals from the baleen whale suborder, and are well known for breaching and their complex songs. They are, as we know humongous and as for that, I'd like to talk about their feeding behaviour.

An average-sized can eat up to 2500kg of food every day duing their feeding season! This season lasts for 120 days, and takes place in the Antarctic (cold water) so yea, talk about intense food festival.

Because they are baleen whales, they filter feed tiny crustaceans, planktons & small fishes through the baleen. I've also read somewhere that their favourite is the Antarctic krills that are available only seasonally as well.

Interesting, huh? :)

of Shaneel's fiery lantern and breaching humpback whales!

2010-08-29T12:39:00.004+10:00

the urge to go whale watching has long bugged me.

and it helps when shaneel & pascaloo both wanted to join the soonest i voiced out my plan to them about it a month ago. time has been such a bitch since, but we (along with vanessa & damien) managed to cheat it and leave for the weekend all the way to hervey bay, the whale-watching capital of the world :)

we decided to camp the night before since we had to be at the deck by 730am. we headed to beerburrum all the way from brisbane, a journey that took 4hours in pascaloo's tiny Getz. that is equivalent to me, dams & vanessa having to squeeze our bums at the back, fully making fun of each other's distorted self along the way. but it was fun nonetheless.

we arrived a bit late, hence getting to set up the tents in the dark. dinner was simply divine when everyone was so close to morphing into a pack of hungry grizzly bears in the middle of a camping park! i swear, the rockmelon slices i had that night tasted like the best rockmelon ever... slurpppppp yummy!

on to tea & ghost stories time in the tent- which might i say, involved some peculiarly interesting true stories & tea spilling all over Shaneel's air-pumped mattress. we called it a day at 10pm, and i had a really good sleep in my lil tent.

sunday started early. in fact, extremely early. i woke up at 430am, had a walk to the best spot for sunrise, and was back to the camp site on time to pack everything and leave. the drive to hervey bay took us about 40minutes, and left us plenty of time for a quick coffee & croissant. we got on Shayla Cruise and please, the rest is history!

i wont bother explaining much of the many magical encounters we had with the many curious, playful pod of whales on that full day cruise. but of course, let the pictures & videos do the talking :)

spot damien in his excited mode...

pascalooooooo.

three whales in the first pod.

synchronous swimming, check!

whale breaching, check!

tail slapping, check!

whale blow, check!

me camwhoring, check! hehe..

we were meant to wave & shout to attract their attention, and to keep them lingering at our boat longer. you can guess who screamed the loudest, lol.

spot the barnacles & tubercles on their skin.

close up at the barnacles.

this female whale was so playful. she rolled around the boat, waved her fins, and yes, basically acting cool :P which we obviously don't mind..

this was recorded by pascale, and im pretty its her in the video.

Whale Watching on Shayla - Hervey Bay (Australia)
Uploaded by bibouvanou. - Watch funny animal videos.

more tail slapping.

this was taken at about 3pm, as we headed back to the marina. you can tell that makcik kat dlm tu was already quite sick of seeing any more whales. haha.

oh, and we found this weird couple on our way back. the female was on top, fully hugging the male underneath her if you can see... and they were in that position for quite a while, circling the boat.

the cruise departed at 8am, and returned close to 5pm the same day. it costs me only AUD110 for a full day cruise, and they provide food (goooooood food) & drinks on board. it was family-owned, small scale cruise company, and i dont know if i havent mentioned this already, but ALWAYS go for the small scale tours/cruises. they use small environmental-friendly boats, and are usually genuinely in the business out of passion, and not for the profit they can yield from it.. plus the services they provide have never once failed me! :)

we drove back to brisbane the same day. i know, who doesnt hate monday!

but with a scenery this breathtaking, and such good friends to enjoy it with, i say why not? :)

(click here to see the full album)

till we meet again, playful whales!

have i not mentioned this?

2010-08-16T16:52:00.002+10:00

Bee sting makes you cleverer, no kidding.

Tasmania sneak peak 4

2010-08-13T21:36:00.004+10:00

South bit of South Bruny Island, Tasmania.

How does rocky shores equate to a box of chocolates?
You tell me.

After all, it's my fav spot of the beach :)

what's going on?

2010-08-13T21:27:00.000+10:00

Picture isn't a picture if it doesn't tell a story.

That's what I always keep in mind when I'm out and about with my camera. If you'd notice, I have started putting some of my fav shots on board. Hopefully they deliver to you dear readers, the same stories they deliver to me. Just a lil something for the blog, for those times when words fail to deliver.

Have a good day!

June 17th

2010-08-10T21:29:00.005+10:00

ramadhan is just around the corner, and i dont know, it reminds me of food, and food reminds me of shepet.. a lot. this probably nests on the memory of her being the super BIG eater at every meal time. aaargh rinduuuu :(

and you know what doesnt help? me stumbling into the several last pictures of her when she was soooooo sick. that up there especially. at that point she couldnt even lift her limbs, let alone groom herself. mucous started clogging her nasal and saliva drooling all over her face.. it sucked big time, coz all i could do was wiping them off, gently.

i dont even know why i'm writing this. to keep remembering, i suppose. sigh.

Easter Break 2010: Fraser Island 4-Days 4WD Adventure

2010-08-08T17:21:00.005+10:00

SPOILER: ME SWIMMING IN LAKE BIRRABEEN! :)

Okieee, here goes.

Another honest attempt to summarize (in picture forms) one of my many outdoor excursions. And this time it's the picturesque Fraser Island! :) The largest sand island in the world, and listed as one of the World Heritage sites.

It was such a break from uni since I left a day after my proposal due *is there such thing as happy grin?* Jess, a friend who visited from UK had this trip covered in her blog here 1 and 2. And while she has done the writing bit, I thought I'd just get away with these pictures (banyak, i know..) Oh, and before I forget, there were 4 4wds in our trip.

Ok, let's row the boat!

Introducing Jess (left) and Jo, on our ferry trip to the island. Both pretty eager to conquer FI with me!

The map.

This is Lake Birrabeen, the second lake stop. Quickly became my fav lake of all time, no kidding. We stopped at Lake Brown first, and no one liked it.

That's me, the first to jump in! :)

Pretty riteee this lake.....

On to more crazy driving along the beach.. have I mentioned the beachway is the highway here? with speed limit and lanes etc.

First camping ground of the trip: The Cornwells Break site. No toilet, no facility whatsoever. This can't get any better :D Most campgrounds on the island are located on the beach, for ease of tracking and supervision by the rangers.

More driving on the beach!

My tent with Jess. The beach is right behind our tent, about 20metres away.

Back to basics cooking.

The heater that kept us warm.

Ampaian segera.

Christian's clan joined the crowd.

Jess again.

Second day and I found a DINGO! :)

Errr, you tell me.

Us and the other 3 in our group. You cant go 4wdriving alone on the island. At this point we decided to explore the inland... but got lost for 3 freaking hours. OUCH.

The rainforest patch here was quite interesting, and everyone decided to get out of the car to stretch.

Jess & myself got too comfortable at the back seats with the pillows.

Back to the beach, and we stopped at Eli Creek. One of the many famous attractions there.

The massive tour crowds..

I got distracted by this semi-tadpole! So cute!

For some reason kids just got a lil crazier on Eli Creek. I have no idea why..

More crowd. We had our lunch here anyway.

Finished lunch and drove to Maheno Wreck.

And to the Pinnacles.

On to our second campground, with Adam & his partner joining us for the night. At this point 1 car had left the island, while Christian's drove back to their first campground.
Our tent's view :)

The beach.

The cars were parked this way to act as buffers to the strong wind.

Such cute couple they are. Got all the fancy camping gear, pftt, jealous much!

Another dinner preparation :)

Third day just got prettier. We first headed to Champagne Pool in the morning to beat the crowd.

View on the walking track to Champagne Pool.

Hustle & bustle on the stairs leading to CP.

Breathtaking lah enuf said!

Razor shell hazard alert.

After a good two hours relaxing at CP, we then drove to Indian Heads. You're meant to be able to see rays from up the hill but we didn't.. Hmph!

Jo at the Indian Heads beach.

Indian Heads.

View from the top of the cliff. Can you see how the beach is somewhat connected to the massive massive sandblow?

At the top..

The sandblow.

Hitesh helping another car who got stuck in the sand. Its actually pretty frequent that this happened and we had to help.

Random boys rushed to help, so weird..

The 4WD track map of the whole island.

Me & Jo :)

The Knifeblade Sandblow from the lookout.

It's amazing how the force of wind did this all.

Us on the walk back to the car. This tree here is Scribby Gum, or scientifically known as Eucalyptus racemosa.

We went for another swim at another lake just before dark, but no one took any picture. 3rd day was the most tiring I must say.

Fourth day, just a quick dip at Lake McKenzie. This lake is the most famous on the island, but I didnt buy that. Too crowded!

GROUP PHOTOS A MUST!

That's all from this trip for now (PHEW), we headed back to the barge straight from Lake McKenzie, all pretty eager to be back to civilization. Since this island has over 100 dune lakes and with several even being known as the cleanest lakes in the world, i was in my swimwear most of the time.. there was really no time to waste for changing, trust me.

This trip only cost me AUD110 for camping & national park entry fees, food, diesel and ferry altogether for that 4 days.. similar trip, tour-guided, could have charged me up to AUD1500! Ahhh the beauty of having such awesome local friends :)

Thanks to Hitesh again, for hooking me up with this trip. And of course, Jo and Jess too, for being fantastic 'ceremony' buddies :)

moonwalking club-winged manakins!

2010-08-06T12:26:00.004+10:00

Remember what I told you about birds and their extremely interesting courtship behaviour?

Here's another one I stumbled into.

Watch to the very end of the clip, even late MJ couldn't have possibly top that!

roasted zoology 15!

2010-07-30T12:34:00.000+10:00

Let's talk about koalas and their lazy bums! These fur balls spend up to 20 hours a day sleeping. And while many may curse them for being soooooooo pemalas, there's one thing you have to know though.

Koalas eat mainly Eucalypt leaves, which are highly toxic to begin with. To detoxify the poisonous compounds, they have to remain stationary for about 80% of their day and lower down their metabolic rate. In fact, they have one of the lowest metabolic rate of any mammal.

So there we go, and no, they're obviously not drunk :)

freeze

2010-07-28T22:31:00.004+10:00

somebody fly me back home. pleaseeee.

happy 50th birthday, Mak.
you raised us all 8 so well i couldnt have asked for any bit more.

Tasmania sneak peak 3

2010-07-24T18:44:00.002+10:00

curious lil kids upon spotting a jellyfish washed ashore at South Bruny Island

to be surprised, to wonder, is to begin to understand.
-José Ortega y Gasset (1883-1955)

how would you prefer your eggs?

2010-07-16T23:10:00.011+10:00

i was having a conversation with a fellow zoologist over our brief lunch, on zoological and animal-related stuffs, like any other days. from the biggest dead-end issues to lil things that we do daily; small things, big impacts. since im very much a talk-the-talk rather than write-the-talk kinda girl, more often than not, those topics didn't make it to this blog.... until today.

i somewhat feel called to put this topic in writing since it is so embedded in our daily routine, that i am 60% confident that you, readers, if not already considering to sign this pledge with me, will at least ponder upon it before you go to sleep.

so, the big question is, how would you prefer your eggs?
students on a tight-budget like myself, will almost always go economical by choosing cage eggs. it costs us no sweat, compared to other expensive free-range, organic or barn-laid options. but have we ever thought about how the eggs are produced?

image courtesy of AECL

to be honest i have been struggling with that issue long enough it bugs me every time i get to the aisle where all the eggs are. i was forever tempted to grab the free-range eggs, but the price has always been so off-putting and deterring to some extent, that i end up picking up cage eggs eventually :(

caged hens are each kept in a space less than an A4 piece of paper that they are unable to express natural behaviours as simple as scratching in the dirt. they live their life standing on a wire mesh floor; they can’t stretch out and flap their wings, perch, roost, dust bathe, forage for food or satisfy their natural urge to lay their eggs in a nest. a staggering number of 11.6million hens suffer chronically throughout their short lives, all thanks to the greedy farmers who cares more about the whopping profit they are aiming to yield rather than paying the hens a lil bit more respect.

i know as a fact, Islam has taught me well in respecting the food and rezeki we are blessed with. i know too, that every animal on earth has their same right to live favorably. at the end of the day, it all comes down to you sticking to your principles. and these principles, it makes you you.

so today, i pledge to stop buying caged eggs.
i pledge to learn more about where my food comes from before buying them.
i pledge to ensure no animals are put to suffer in producing the food i eat every day.

you wanna hop on board?

more information here and here.

fetish talk

2010-07-15T21:19:00.004+10:00

there's just something so alluring with guys who love animals.

the way they care so much for those lil creatures it tickles me, every single time. i mean, how often do you come across an XY that addresses his pets by names that you seriously thought he was referring to another human-friend for a while.

and this dude here, please, talk about my very own baked macaroon!

(i spent a good half an hour looking for that season2 bondi vet's promo on channel 10, with chris surfing and all. knape tak jumpe? grr)

ok merepek. 945pm is wayyy past my bedtime no kidding. field works really knock me off these days.

Tasmania sneak peak 2

2010-07-12T10:39:00.002+10:00

lovers savouring the view from The Neck, South Bruny Island

nature is painting for us, day after day, pictures of infinite beauty.

-John Ruskin (1819-1900)

Tasmania sneak peak 1

2010-07-07T12:23:00.001+10:00

Mt Cradle at beautiful Tasmania, Australia

the wilderness holds answers to questions man has yet learned to ask.
- Nancy Newhall

my bestfriend's wedding

2010-07-04T15:41:00.005+10:00

since i'm stuck at uni on SUNDAY with a printer that's doing a better job at crumpling the papers instead of printing on it, i thought i'd amuse myself with these wedding pictures from mamat's camera (i love you hunn!). looking at all the moments captured, sigh, i miss the girls a lot more now that uni is just throwing me workloads after workloads.

this post will be a shower of pictures that i took from facebook; starting from her akad in the morning to the private bersanding ceremony in the evening. so yea, rejoice!

us with the bride in the morning. seri pengantin GELL! :)

jama and her hantarans. excluding the yellow fan, thank you.

this picture was taken right about the same time azmil lafaz the akad. we all held hands and got teary eyes, oh what a moment..

azmil, the groom.

that, on the dulang (what's dulang in english anyway?) is the gold (i dont know if its in coin, bar or nugget form) he presented to her as mas kahwin.

us after the akad ceremony.

on to practicing for the speech i needed to deliver during the afternoon ceremony.

jamie, stop growing up too fast!

more kurshians :)

see, i told you. azmil was actually forced to marry jama.

i hate that mic till the day i die. period.

the ami family with the pengantin. tu belum bajai and all our cats included. hehe.

:) :) :)

here is me with tini and farid (lomu), my primary school friend. after so long.. :)

me and the boys that came to celebrate jama.

titans clustered.

the im-allowed-to-sit-on-the-bride look. i loveeeee you J! :)

more of us invading the pelamin.

at some point that day, this had to happen, hehe.

ok, ok, i get it. that's enough.

the gorgeous apin, my neighbour in kuala kangsar.

RINDU LAH!

jama drowning in fresh flowers.

everyone was already soooo tired by this time, but the show much go on weyh.

the night affair.

azmil's get-this-over-and-done-with look. lol.

the beautiful girls :)

have i mentioned the poncho2 dance we had that night too? gotta love the whole kaki-out-of-beat in the beginning. john to the rescue, luckily!

awwww john trying her luck. so cute lah my girls.

good times.

they dont last long, do they?

tini and i stayed for another night before we left early the next morning. sakitnya dada time tu for i dont know when i'll see them all again. no kidding weh, when i get back, i will freaking demand that once a week dinner with everyone!

to a friend i feel more comfortable referring to as a sister.

i miss you heaps!

2 days trip to Matang Mangroves Reserve

2010-07-02T15:59:00.003+10:00

first of all, this is for you Encik Buyong! kalau kerja jadi tourist guide dekat sini, En. Buyong sure dah kaya raya! :)

where do i begin with this one? i was at home early this year when Ayah and i sort of got into a small fight/argument about my future. that is a complete different issue that needs its own post title so i shall leave it at that. anyway, i think he felt bad for making me feel bad hence the idea of bringing me to this reserve. he got on the phone with his anak-buah (an employee he supervised during his forester days) that has made his way up to become the head ranger of Matang Reserve and asked if he would be kind enough to show us both around there, and you bet right, he did :)

the whole trip was F.U.N. and err, a bit soaky. we spent up to three hours on the boat getting from one place to another. i have to say, the cruise really gave me a whole new appreciation towards the beauty of mangroves and how important these protective belt of vegetation is in stabilizing the whole ecosystem. and dont even make me start on feeling way grateful with the life God has given me, as i compare mine with those of the fishermen's...

En. Buyong, yes, that tall dark and handsome man up there, was appointed to 'entertain' us for that 2 days. all these while i always knew that my dad is someone important in the forestry department, but to receive all these luxurious hospitality, boy was i blown away. they gathered up to him for that 2 days we had breakfast with the whole staff, they gave him the cushion-est chair to sit, they prepared us a lunch and really presented the meal in nice servings and expensive cutleries. they even booked the seminar room to greet us on the first day. confuse gelll. but i can soooo see how bad my dad misses his forestry days, he was in such a good mood the whole week after :)

throughout that 2 days, i met 3 vipers, several endangered eagle species and sooooo many birds. this reserve, to be honest, doesnt hold the same beauty as the other national parks ive been to. it's so green and unique, i would be so unfair to even compare it with other places. it holds its own class of beauty, and one that Malaysian should be proud of. the staffs are just immaculately polite, and seem to be genuinely interested in keeping the reserve the way it is.

ok that was me working the 'screw-the-animals-let's-cut-down-the-trees' pose. apparently Ayah said i nailed it T.T

the 'floating' fishermen village' i talked about. this is just a glimpse of them all. there were a lot more houses at their 'town' area.

a common sight of a mangrove forest. this is actually the replanted batch.

its protruding roots as we know.

En. Buyong engaging in a serious discussion with Ayah (not in the picture) while we head to the jetty (where the boats were).

err. enuf said.

the beautiful viper. i was so close to touching it (nak acah acah je padahal) before Ayah gave me one hell of a smack on my head. pftt, and you dare asked me why we never get along, hehe.

En. Buyong leading the hike. i cant remember the length of this hike though, but it led us to a big waterhole where all the birds hang out.

a fisherman with his/her catching for the day. now i feel like having kerang rebus (drool!)

the mangrove snails

this guy makes the best hand-crafted souvenirs from mangrove timber. that small boat i was holding, he carved in less than 10 minutes! and he lives on that boat too.. pakcik ni cool, kesimpulannye.

last but not least, Ayah buncit kesayanganku :)

i actually had more things i wanna write, but as usual, memory fails me big time. again, many thanks to the Perhutanan staffs for the hospitality. It was indeed a full 2 days of real adventure: boating, hiking, cruising, and errr, mangroving all for free :)

the Matang Reserve is well conserved and taken care of, thanks to you wonderful people.

stradbroke island on 4WD

2010-07-02T14:23:00.003+10:00

this is farrr too outdated but i thought i'd share with everyone anyway.

we went on what is described as an 'earnest attempt' to leave the city and be one with nature. and also, what could possibly be a better way to get Hitesh's baby out and roaring?

funny thing is, i only knew that this trip was actually organized by these social pajero club members until i got there. knowing them bring so much more new perspectives. apparently rich people still love camping and living in the bush ;)

wont dwell much on the details, since ive been here far too many times. on a high note, it is always nice to venture and explore this pristine island in a different way, along with new faces.

bowersome birds!

2010-07-02T12:37:00.002+10:00

i realized my blog has lost its zoology feel lately. too much of prattling is really not cool, Ami. gahh, so here's my attempt to go zoologious again, and please dear God, i hope it stays that way. hehe.

earlier in the blog, i voiced out my fascination on male bowerbird and their explicitly interesting courtship rituals. i mean, dude, you really went that far to get laid, huh? thought the bower was, yea, impressive, from the pictures i saw then untillllll i went for my one-week field trip to Lamington NP. those creatively decorated bowers we bumped into, i have to say, hat's off to the boys!

ok, the pictures dont do justice AT ALL. this is from a friend's trip album on Facebook and her camera wasnt that flashy. even we cant assemble the sticks together that nice. these fellas only use their beak for everything.

there were quite a few of satin bowerbird's resident population there, and they love anything blue. they play stealing a lot, and while we were there, a girl lost her blue shoe lace only to find that it was tied nicely on one of the bower stick nearby from where we stayed. sneaky birds!

being a NG nerd, i also feel like it's my call to share with everyone an article on these amazing birds that they have featured in their July 2010 magazine. it's about time, to be honest. in the article they observed the whole ritual performed by 'Donald' who was from their prediction, the dominant male in that area, judging from the height of his bower, the captivating melody of him singing and the way he dances so charmingly. oh well, to the joy of flirting! :)

for those lazybums who prefer pictures, here's a better link. scroll all the way to the last 5 pictures, and prepare to be amazed. LAWA SGT LAH!

blueberry blues

2010-06-30T12:17:00.002+10:00

(at 3AM last night)

abang, Sarah suke tak giraffe tu?

- kalau die ade buat percubaan nak makan bende tu maknenye die suke le tu.

too much, or none (literally) of uni work can make one sick. or think of home. and somehow last night, home is perfectly equivalent to the thoughts of Sarah and her giggles.

with all these Brisbane-based job offers i started getting, i cant help to wonder which place i am feeling more comfortable calling home anymore.

i miss my niece, period.

falling slowly

2010-06-27T02:03:00.000+10:00

I don't know you
But I want you
All the more for that
Words fall through me
And always fool me
And I can't react
And games that never amount
To more than they're meant
Will play themselves out

Take this sinking boat and point it home
We've still got time
Raise your hopeful voice you have a choice
You'll make it now

Falling slowly, eyes that know me
And I can't go back
Moods that take me and erase me
And I'm painted black
You have suffered enough
And warred with yourself
It's time that you won

Take this sinking boat and point it home
We've still got time
Raise your hopeful voice you had a choice
You've made it now
Falling slowly sing your melody
I'll sing along

here is to all you ladies who missed my speech (how dare you!)

2010-06-23T15:36:00.006+10:00

after receiving much persuasions (several even turned to death threats, lol) to put this up, i figured, why torture these poor souls, right? ececewah, sape suruh bersiap letak tepung gomak kat muka tu lama2! (partly joking, hehe).

so here goes, the speech text.

*sembah tuanku*
*adjusting the microphone height that just doesnt go any lower, in my head thinking i'm soooo screwed slash i cant get any shorter!*

assalamualaikum and a very good day to all.

first and foremost, may i mention that what i'm about to say doesn't come from me alone, but also from the other 9 girls that make up our core group of friends.

what Jamalina and we have are 11 years of memories, both bitter and sweet. we started as study buddies, preparing for PMR at the school canteen. never did we expect that it will lead us all to where we are today.

as some of you present today would concur, a foundation of friendship that's built on 5 years in a boarding school together, namely TKC in our case, creates a bond that is indescribable. we've slept on the same bed, shared the same meals, escaped assemblies while hiding in the ironing room, and enjoyed her mother, Aunty Muni's sambal ikan bilis which might i add, tastes like a piece of heaven.

Jama is a force to be reckoned with. and i can tell, coz i was literally shaking when i got here late yesterday. she can membebel, and i mean membebel a mile a minute, but that's why we love her dearly. in our group of 11 close friends, she keeps us in check and makes sure we stay in touch, which i have to say is hard work, since we're scattered over several parts of the world.

i even skipped one week of classes and got in debt to fly back to be part of this wedding today. the things i do for you, love.

over the past few years, we have shared all the nitty gritty details of our love lives, with most of her boyfriends being mutual friends. so you can imagine our surprise when Azmil got into the picture. honestly, we were quite hesitant about him at first. but rest assured thou, that some of us have spent some time with him and have come to realize that she has genuinely found a life partner, and that we now welcome you Azmil, into our family. yes, the 11 of us are indeed, a family.

we wish you the very best for your future together and hope that you both are blessed with God's Rahmah.

lastly, i'd like to dedicate part of this poem by EE Cummings, in the hope that it will say much more than i would ever be able to express.

here is the deepest secret nobody knows

here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud and the sky of the sky of the tree called life;
which grows higher than the soul can hope or mind,can hide

and this is the wonder that’s keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart, i carry it in my heart

congratulations to both of you again, and thank you.

i fumbled a bit, thanks to my lidah melayu and that stupid unadjustable mic. i knew it would betray me at some point, ptfff. anyways, many thanks to the girls, especially john, who helped structured the speech. we decided to keep it simple and sweet for jama, plus i was only allocated 3 freaking minutes to go all mushy.

to jama & azmil, no words can truly express how i felt that day. it was all intense and blurry, but in a good way trust me. excuse me sobbing during the akad, i just couldnt grasp the fact that my bestfriend is about to be a wife. which in a girl's head, would mean, she will no longer be the same bestfriend. but i honesly dont know what is it specifically that youve done azmil, but you've made this transition easy on us 11 girls. i mean, she's the first in the group to get hitched, obviously everyone had their share of eerie feelings kan? so yes, we aren't kidding when we say we welcome you into our circle. i expect some jumps of joy- not many lad get to break into our family, youre the first in fact! hehe)

i had heaps of fun, and jama, i thank you for the comfort you offered me that night. i miss you, and your shoulders, and how easy my tears let loose when im with you. i love you, i truly love you.

THE SCHOOL OF BIOLOGICAL SCIENCES NEWSLETTER Vol 74

2010-06-23T12:36:00.002+10:00

For all of you interested in reading updates on what we zoologists do under the Goddard roof, here is another monthly snippet.

Ok, now on to my bebelan please.

Pictured above is Dr Chadden Hunter, a wildlife filmmaker I deeply respect. He is a UQ alumni, I need to mention, and will come around to give an hour seminar on the power of media in injecting awareness for wildlife conservation amongst the public. That will be on July 6th, and please, you cant guess this wrong, I have obviously secured my seat for that.

BUT..

The school is hosting lunch with him a day before, which is on the 5th. Such a perfect timing. Of all the days kannnn. I will be out battling on field with Sean for our very first new habitat survey, and theres no way I can chicken my way out of that without looking less committed in my honours work. Bummer, or hang on, make the alphabets capital.

BUMMER.

yep, thats more like it.

You are the only exception

2010-06-21T09:39:00.001+10:00

Rest in peace, love.

XXX

2010-06-16T21:42:00.002+10:00

shepet hasnt been eating for a week including today.

she's a cat so close to my heart, and one lil fluffball that keeps me wanting to just ditch everything at Australia and fly back home every time life pushes me to the very edge of giving up. i should have known she was actually really sick, and not just putting up an act by not eating to get my attention since im back few days ago. she slept by my side, if not on my chest for the last two nights, and i swear i didnt notice anything worrying, until today when she starts smelling bad (she hasnt been grooming for a week) and just not move at all. her nasal is blocked from the mucus, and her limbs are all weak. kak ami and i will leave to ipoh first thing in the morning tomorrow to get the vet ease her pain. to be honest i wont be surprised if putting her to sleep is the only way to do it.

i dont know why im writing all these, when its only making me sadder. tonight might just be the last night she sleeps on my chest, ever :(

pit stop

2010-06-16T01:31:00.003+10:00

i remember how it felt leaving malaysia few months ago with all those knots undone.

this time, being back, feels a thousand times more like home than the last one :)

repost: Luring enough?

2010-06-08T17:15:00.002+10:00

glowworming again?

2010-06-04T16:08:00.004+10:00

this is gonna be a long post, so bear with me.

im just too inspired my hands are shaking.

so i went to a seminar today by Dave, which for most of you know as my supervisor last year on my glowworm project. he was the kindest person on earth you can ever imagine, and someone i was completely comfortable working with. before i proceed, here is just the snippet of his talk just now.

if you havent heard of glowworms, theyre a kind of fly that illuminates. some people got confused with the 'worm' name but thats just to illustrate the larvae form of these flies that has the ability to produce light. glowworms are only found in NZ and Australia, and they are such strong tourism force due to their uniqueness.

in his talk Dave summarized his work on Tasmanian and NZ's glowworms, much of which amazed everyone in the seminar room. he viewed to us a selection of results he has gathered so far, and to my surprise, included the work i did with him last year in the slide too, with my name printed on it. my name appeared again in the acknowledgement slide.

to be honest i feel really bad for not taking up honours with him instead. i could continue my research with him, or leave that and took up R's offer on koala research. i made up my mind, and as you know, focused on koala during honours. but there has always been a tiny voice in my head that wonders the what ifs.

D was so good to me throughout the 6 months research i did with him, and even offered me a new Mac if i wanted to continue doing honours. he mentioned trips to NZ and Tasmania too, if funding got approved. he was that kind. and this year quite truthfully, i have been making excuses to not catch up with him, largely due to feeling guilty for turning his offer down, although i knew he didnt feel offended at any way by my decision. and just now i thought to myself, that has to stop.

i knocked on his door, and found him smiling at the sight of me (that was a huge relief actually). we ended up just catching up like old times, with both asking how everything is. he told me he went to Borneo early this year and the next thing i knew, we both gushed to the pictures he showed me on his huge Mac of snails and butterflies of Borneo. so it was all good :)

for the record, it wasnt because glowworms are less interesting that i turned the offer down. they are remarkably interesting, brilliant creatures. but i was an outdoor person by heart, and was genuinely looking for other options when the koala work came along. when i heard his talk just now, the interest towards glowworms studies just started falling back on my very lap. i bravely voiced it out to him, and he smiled.

wait, why was he smiling?

i think he always knew i wasnt quite enjoying my days in the lab (so true), but i would be the most vocal during our field trips to collect the larvae down at the GC (the view was amazinggggg). oh btw, in the talk, he showed us the nice lil hut he stayed in at the very southern tip of Tasmania everytime he went down there to collect the larvae in Mystery Creek Cave nearby. he went every January, sometimes more frequently, and the hut he stayed in had the best view of wild Tassie, something ive always been in love with since my last trip there. back to my story. so since Ive told him i will be around until January, we both sort of knew i was gonna offer my help to be his field assistant then. trying to find excuses to go to tassie again kannn :)

trust me, i nearly hugged him when he said he was more than happy to include me in next trip should the plan goes well! and since those glowworms are cave-dwelling, we will be caving everyday, setting up cameras and equipments to record their bioluminescence behaviour. something outdoor, BIG TICK.

i believe we both felt really good after an hour of chit-chatting. he asked me about my future plans, and welcomes me anytime if i wanna continue on my work with him. i could really use a big slap on the face right now, for all these while avoiding him, thinking that ive hurt him.

question is, will i bounce back to glowworming?

i'll end my post with that.

juggling so many options in my head can really drive me crazy.

a cendol in exchange would be slurp-ious!

2010-06-03T17:20:00.003+10:00

a close friend just dropped by my room an hour ago. and if i havent mentioned this before, she was my friend that can 'read' people (or at least thats what she believes she can). we havent seen each other since the last inspiring lecture by Craig Franklin last year, so the hugging lasted a while.

she looked at my desk, and the notes i have on my wall and board. it almost seemed as if she was studying the arrangement of the notes, where the pictures are. and then she looked at my desk, my oh-how-horrifyingly-messy desk. hey, no judgement, i was working really hard ok? haha.

we talked for another good 30 minutes, before she dropped the bomb on me.

'you're sad, i can sense it'

'what? NO WAYYYY im the happiest girl on earth, pleaseeee'

'rubbish. look at your handwriting on the notes, theyre messy and indirectional- something is bothering you. but you didnt attend to these feelings, and i can AGAIN tell, from the nice arrangements you pasted them on the board, its like you still put up a happy face regardless. classic Ami'

'V, are you serious? i was in a rush, for God's sake!'

'nahhh you used blue and black pens in one sentence. you don't do that'

ok honestly at that point i was already starting to freak out. she knows me so well, and there's no doubt about it, but the things she pointed out, weyy, they are so trueeee. i don't do black & blue mixing up, nor ever in million years will i have messy notes. gulp, what has honours done to me?

'i knew it. this is that devil honours psychopathic act on me!'

'pleasee, such dramas. whatever it is in your head, deal with it'

....... silence dominated, before i hugged her again. this time it was way longer, i almost broke her collarbone.

when you've been away for so long; from the spirit that keeps you going, from the support system that held you up, the system gets a lil distorted. it functions still, but often the case you dont even realize the loose bolts that need tightening.

i've been functioning. in fact, i've never been more functional in my life than for the past few weeks. but was i in need of some screw-tightening, thats the tricky part.

stop reading my mind, V!

dream big

2010-05-31T13:40:00.000+10:00

he is me in few years time insya-Allah :)

http://sci-s03.bacs.uq.edu.au/biol/biol-news/may10/feature4.html

blank

2010-05-30T21:55:00.004+10:00

i was planning my hiking trips to kinabalu, new zealand, and kangaroo island.
and an ingredient is missing i realized.

the curve

2010-05-29T21:59:00.002+10:00

im counting days to fly back home.

sarah needs some serious hugs and gomois, not to mention series of kidnappings. jama will soon be joining the Puans club (already!) while i sob to the urgency of settling down. the lil grown up kittens at home on the other hand, what can i say, will be squished so bad their eyes pop out! oh, and of course, the familia, enough said.

for this one week, i will escape.

except that, not yet.

i can feel the sabah breeze now already :)

2010-05-23T01:58:00.002+10:00

few hours ago huda and i got bored while we had our cheese cake so we decided to look up at some cheap flights for february next year. we have been in fact, for the last two days. i was thinking phnom penh or siem reap coz i'd kill to backpack there even for a week. or maybe definitely bangalore just because. i mean, who needs a reason to go to india please?

so anyway, we were so sure on bangalore. we looked at the fare and it just didnt do us justice. damn it. i swear my one leg is already swinging by the busy streets of that classic india. but i want a getaway still. i will be here until end of january next year, and insya-allah by march i would have flown to africa, so february is the ONLY time i have.

and then Kota Kinabalu just popped into the picture. yes, our very own KK. i mean, i've always had this tiny dream to conquer Mount Kinabalu since last year, but in my mind that mission will roughly be attended earliest on 2012. we checked the fare and it fell perfectly within our tiny budget :) our spontaneous act just secured us a 3 return flights from KL to KK next year wooohoooo!

the downside is, all i can think about right now is the climb. anddddd the fact that Ayah still DOESNT have a clue. ERK. but he cant stop me, im already 22 for god's sake (hehe..). i might need to exclude huda and hana from the climb since i dont wanna drag them into this time-consuming agenda of mine, kesian pulak diorg. luckily my aunty, who is a plastic surgeon that serves the army (and by that i mean a hardcore outdoor person) has climbed it once and is giving me all the tips i need to survive. lol, extra excitement holla!

this is ridiculous. it's already 215AM and im still as excited as we were hours ago when huda purchased the tickets. i need my sleep, far out.

the selective hiccup

2010-05-18T16:13:00.002+10:00

today i bumped into FN0908.

it's actually funny how memories hit you, they're almost like those ghosts from the past. a minute you were rushing to find that ecology paper, the next thing you know you were staring at that piece of paper. and thats when breathing gets harder.

i took a while to let loose. just breathe, and let the memories take me to a different world.

it is all hustle and bustle with uni life, this random incident is surprisingly soothing, somewhat.

at one point i swear i could feel the breeze again. it was cold. i couldnt see though, it was really foggy. concentrated long enough to see that other figure next to me. and there that person is, and i instantly smile. it was like a rush of excitement, something you can't... explain. and don't stay long.

fun times in that scale last about 9 days of memories. it goes out at 268789, and it doesnt matter the digit it came back as. because all is lost anyway, the minute you lock the door.

Saturday at 430PM

2010-05-15T16:34:00.002+10:00

i have been thinking A LOT the past few days. yes, that comes with a lot of sleepless nights, and grumpy tummy.

so we all know i'm striving to get a placement in Africa for at least 6 months once i graduated. i was hoping to grab a hold on one of those self-funded field assistant jobs they have around, but money is pretty tight. which erases my dream to even volunteer there.

i've been asking around Goddard, and boy they are so supportive :) i mean, money may be an issue but that can't stop me from going anyhow. and the ayah-not-giving-me-permission issue, i sure can work on that.

as for now, I have two options waiting on plate. Madagascar work with the Germany Wildlife Inst. and some other primate work at Nigeria which i'm yet to be explained about via email. these, on top of one other opportunity in Namibia, working with a PhD student from UQ on baboons. R said i could wait until i get my scroll, or proceed anyway, since these works will only commence early next year.

but i'll stop here. these shouldnt even be in the picture until i get someone to sponsor me. proceed and i will bleed.

what's my point of this post anyway? freakkkk. im a freak.

one chapter down

2010-05-11T23:35:00.001+10:00

i feel........ numb.

do you?

2010-05-04T22:47:00.002+10:00

i don't understand why women can be so emotionally vulnerable they start to act foolish enough they drive men crazy.

i don't understand petals that fell on the ground yet still holds the beauty of a virgin bloom.

i don't understand why everything has to be about grades nowadays, when learning seems a lot more fun back then at no scale and pressure and expectations.

i don't understand how a voice of a mother can easily soothe a lost soul, regardless of how broken it is.

i don't understand why koalas have to go extinct, and we know they will one day, but that we can't do anything rather than watching it happens.

and honestly, i don't understand how a person can be low enough to judge a friend so bad only on their few last conversations, overlooking the strong bonds that they've built to that far, and disgustingly set a conditional term if they were ever to remain friends still.

i don't, i really do not understand these.

today marks my 22nd years being fortunate enough to experience life as it is, and i still don't know the answers to these. i could be turning 50 years ahead and still have no clue.

i guess life really works in a mysterious way kan.
so yea, happy birthday me.

4 petals in the morning

2010-05-03T09:58:00.003+10:00

some things are extremely good only while it lasted.
this can happen so very often, leaving you perplexed as to how it can depreciate and come to an end, because it was so good you would have thought it's unbreakable.

some other things, rare and precious, you need to be lucky enuf to even smell their aroma or appreciate the sighting, let alone venture into one.
in this case, obviously my luck scale hasn't yet qualified me to experience one.

but whatever colour there is on the canvas, today feels like a breathe of fresh air, still.
and im grateful as i can be.

sweet sweet 2008

2010-04-30T11:44:00.002+10:00

TEVA!

2010-04-28T23:06:00.004+10:00

so i've been looking at quite a few hiking boots lately. the one that i currently have from Timberland is just a pain in the ass, just a bit too loose and it hurts my ankle everytime i accidentally lost my grip on the ground. and the fact that coming weeks onwards will only witness me running around chasing koalas and collecting in-field data until Honours is officially over, boy i need a new hiking boots.

i have always loved Teva, since the day i borrowed Kak Nem's Teva sandal while i crashed Johnky's place last few years. it was comfy and just practical, no stupid beads nor shiny stupid dangling stuffs sticking on it. you wouldnt be physically attracted to it the first time you see it, just how i like it :) the one i have is just a miracle. i swear everyone in Brisbane has at least seen me once with it, if not just always with it. haha. smpai belang2 kaki bekas the straps. although the current collections are a lot more trendy, oh what the hell, i love you anyhow you look.

so back to my point, i knew Teva has produced some of the BEST hiking boots ever, and the only reason i haven't had one is because its so freaking expensive, perfectly on par with its quality (which literally means, it is freaking comfortable). couldnt help myself to always pretending to try it on at Kathmandu and MountainDesign, before weeping my eyes dry to the sight of the price tag. haha. i can fast for a year, and be a proud owner of this beautiful masterpiece, or maybe settle with another Timberland boots and keep the Teva dream tucked away in my sleep (saddddddd im starting to hate their products). funny thing is, Kathmandu always have this massive sale now and then, and often the case, sume boots on display will be on sale EXCEPT the Teva's. grrrr. why are they never on sale??

my love, Dalea MidEvent Hikers!

oh well. AYAH please if youre reading this have some mercy on me :) hehe he always stocks himself with the latest hiking gears so its about time he provides me some too! until then, maybe i will just get it anyway the soonest JPA money landed in my drought-depressed account and then suck up the fact that i'll be a poor soul for the next few years. but with a comfy boots to live with it, why the hell not? :)

money money come pour down on me!

alright i should be asleep already. bring it on, sweet Teva dreams.

nutella bit

2010-04-21T16:48:00.000+10:00

i have decided to continue my volunteering work at the Lone Pine Koala Sanctuary starting from this Sunday.

i kinda miss the lorikeets, and the koalas, and the kangaroos, and the dearly beloved emus *hugs and kisses on the way*

Hamish who works there also said they just welcomed two platypus in the sanctuary.

I WILL NOT MISS THAT FOR THE WORLD! :)

of broken glasses

2010-04-20T20:46:00.003+10:00

ayah told me i tend to push people away when i'm mad.
he told me too; write whenever my actions and emotional senses seem to be clouded by anger and disappointment.

which is why i'm here instead, when i'm supposed to be there making my presentation slides.
which is also why i spent the whole day just tucking in on my bed, rather than pissing every innocent people there is existing in Goddard building.

i remember the same ME, way back, almost 2-3 years ago. she was an emotional bitch. how funny it is, all these while convincing myself of how i've grown and improved as a person from being the ugly her when today, clearly i havent changed a bit.

the same way i utterly hate people for making excuses for their mistakes, i choose to let my guard down.

today im a selfish person, with a selfish heart. this is my flaw, and if you stick around long enough, there will be more.

and i could say im sorry, but i wont, coz this is me.

orbiting train of thoughts

2010-04-13T12:40:00.005+10:00

sometimes in life you wish for things you don't deserve.

and when you can have it, do you take it right away?

or will you pause, let go, and try to earn it back instead?

if you spend enough time in Goddard...

2010-03-26T19:15:00.003+10:00

you will hear the weirdest, most random things possible.

for instance, Sean just mentioned he wont be around next week to assist me with last minute proposal writing because he has cassowaries to catch up north.

and Bill, well, i dnt know, somewhere in the bush looking for pythons maybe?

Alyssa is all pumped up to run crayfishes in the tank and see which runs faster. keep my word, those with smaller claws will set a high record for sure.

those weird looking people were boasting to some eager undergrads how they get to feed the baby crocodiles up on the rooftop every week.

and how Dean has got the best project on working with the white sharks. pftttt.

Amy will be stalking the grey eastern kangaroos down south (maybe) while Susan having to collect the bridled nailtail wallaby's poo and fur to genetically map them.

luckily my dear supervisor is still around :)

come April everyone will be gone embarking on their honours project.
only fourrrrr freaking days, Ami!
nail this proposal.

GreenEarthFestival2010

2010-03-14T12:37:00.007+10:00

hello there.

was supposed to be at uni drilling every bit of the brain neurons i have in my skull, but the weather decided to dance her way. it rained and stop, the day got really sunny for few minutes, before it started raining again. i wouldnt wanna walk to uni and be all kuyup by the time i get to Goddard so i stayed home.

and please, talk about good procrastinator in action. i vacuumed the entire house, decorated the wall and had a super big aussie breakfast. not to mention the long hot invigorating shower :) ok i better get quick to the main topic before i waste more time.

i volunteered for the Green Earth Festival yesterday. they needed more people for professional event photography and face painting which were both my preferences. I've been wanting to volunteer more this year but the schedule is just crazy that I fear I couldnt commit to the event, so a one off event sounds more like it.

it was indeed a memorable Saturday :) i expected the event to be bigger but the committee said they'd love a more subtle production so long as people get something out of it. which i totally understand since big events cost more money, more electricity, more rubbish, with less aims met due to the big crowd. it's better to have it small, and cater for everyone possible.

there were massive crowds of vegan, and these are the people that intrigued me the most. their strict diet restrictions, to their way of life and even the clothes they wear. i honestly respect. imagine living in a world where you don't consume anything produced or gained from the animals. be it from meat to honey, dairy products, eggs, or any form of product that have used animals for experimentation or abuse. i would have to sacrifice a lot to go to their level.

anyways, there were animal right activists and climate change people everywhere too. i couldnt help but to approach and had a fair bit of conversation with them. got all amazed with their conservation works and enthusiasm. very very inspiring.

most of the time i would be at the kids zone with all the other face painters. the kids were just lovely. they asked about the climate, and why the earth is getting hotter everyday. boys wanted to be painted a blue spiderman, the girls obviously chose to become butterflies :) most of the other volunteers i met were pretty much greenies themselves. and knowing the fact that hey, im not the only WWF and NG freak apparently, totally amused me and my overwhelming thoughts of the changing climate that day.

Huda came to join the festival :) Mia and her friends tagged along too. I bumped into Daniel too, my Mexican-rockclimbing friend. it was a good catch up, well spent Saturday and I would love to have more of those, especially when I know Sunday will be all about uni and work. SUNDAY people, SUNDAY. wek wek wek.

here are some of the pics. from my phone and Huda's.

last but not least, check out this NGO group and see if you'd like to become a member k :)

not another climate change nor animal related post, i swear.

2010-03-09T14:27:00.004+10:00

first off, bahaha, im sorry i lied on the title. it had to happen :P

today i found myself getting all excited for a seminar from Prof McAlpine from the School of Geology on his reflections of Copenhagen Climate Change conference last December. i was mostly over the moon because a lot of koala conservation papers i read for my project was done by him, and hell yeah, obviously because of the mere fact that he attended the most-talked about conference.

as we may all be aware of, the conference came to a dead end. i knew it was intense for the last couple of days but in this seminar he brought up several behind-the-curtain issues and conflicts floating as the conference progressed. from the overwhelming balloons and banners everywhere on the arrival day, to people being totally fragmented by their says and views on climate issues that delegates from developing and developed countries had to sit down in a closed conference to finally come to an agreement (which they never had, anyway).

point is, you can never get to the same page of agreeing to some controversial protocol agreements if the political influence is just enormously crowding. china nak ni, the US nak tu. in the end, they agreed on Copenhagen Accord, which is definitely far away from the targeted outcome but sufficiently adequate with the current, differing economical needs of these leading countries.

and if i was there, i swear i'd stock my socks in their mouth to just keep them shut and agree on something already (emo me- not again!) lol. i mean, you dont have to standardize your reducing-global-emissions-strategies internationally. boleh je buat on sub-national level as suggested by Arnold Schwarzenegger. in fact it has been done by those committed hard core NGOs long before this recent chronic fuss on CC.

ok sendiri ckp banyak keje tak siap. i'd love to talk more but i have another earth-saving mission to accomplish. haha. bye now.

eh, before i forget, lets go green people :)

8:12AM

2010-03-08T08:11:00.002+10:00

been awake for 2 hours, and had the worst sleep last night too. it's one of those sleepless nights, when your brain fails you.

those memories flushing in, it just makes you wanna cry at the wee hours of midnight. you can tell i have some knots undone. i swear to God i tried to untie them over and over again, but those are stubborn ones. lingering and pulling you down.

i guess i need a break. uni has been awesome, dont get me wrong. if its any consolation, its the only thing that actually keeps me going really. proposal writing is huge, with expectations mounting from academics. but i know happy koala days are gonna follow up soon. soon, enough. and as much as im constantly bitching about how creepy Goddard building gets at night, it feels good to be stuck in the room immersing in reading and writing, rather than walking the walk back home, feeling all hopeless and miserable.

point is, i miss her.

but she's day by day disappearing.

let's walk me to uni already.

koala road mortality statistics

2010-02-18T14:23:00.003+10:00

in 5 years (1995-1999) detailed data collection, the Queensland Parks and Wildlife Service recorded a total of 1407 koalas being hit by vehicles, in which, approximately 83% did not survive.

you wanna do the maths?

(Dique, D.S., Thompson, J., Preece, H.J., Penfold, G.C., Villiers, D.L. & Leslie, R.S. (2003). Koala mortality on roads in south-east Queensland: the koala speed-zone trial. Wildlife Research, 30, 419-426)

photo here

uni minus cit cit

2010-02-15T12:26:00.002+10:00

...is not as fun anymore.

uh-ohh.

something is up

2010-02-09T09:46:00.001+10:00

the continent is splitting! :)

i decided to have a different blog on my honours life since I've been feeling the need to write a new post every 5 minutes of the day! lol. it will be an intimate affair kinda blog and I will treat it as my diary (sort of) so yea, time for some self-absorbed posts flooding the wall :P i dont primarily intend on having people reading that blog as much as I'd love it here, but feel free to blog-hop and land there when catching mosquitoes seem to be the most enjoyable thing to do for the day :)

i shall go to sleep now. tomorrow is gonna be a long day for i might be climbing trees trying to grab those sleepy koalas.

i will update this blog more often (i'm trying here trust me) starting from next week i promishhhhhh!

Forward: The Outcome Of The UN Climate Talks In Copenhagen - A WWF Point Of View

2010-01-22T03:50:00.001+10:00

Let's see if we can make it.

Maxwell Hill

2010-01-21T22:06:00.006+10:00

Bukit Larut could have easily won more hearts should the government put a lillll bit more effort in managing it.

It obviously wasn't the best hike Ive had.

Can't help but to compare this, amongst a few other hiking trails available in Malaysia, with that of Australia's.

You heard nothing but sighs of frustration as we reached the peak, only to find that there was not even a decent lookout platform (at leastttt) for hikers to enjoy the view, to compensate the penat lelah they endured. And no, this is not tolerable coz Bukit Larut really has that potential to put itself on the map.

A more hiker-friendly track would be gladly appreciated too.

I love steep, don't get me wrong.

Steep is good.

But it can kill the veteran hikers I can tell you that.

All these aside, enjoy the pictures! :)

tik tok

2010-01-18T14:48:00.003+10:00

cameney, camane nk stopkan masa? macam acan kan, tak nak pegi skolah, ape adik buat?

senang aje. mak kate, amik kemera, masuk dalam gambar. tangkap. kan dah tak gerak.

oh adik.

9 days left :(

ps: cameney, acan and adik refer to one single person.

a lil review on Into the Pride by Animal Planet

2010-01-03T04:26:00.005+10:00

It has been a while since I last thoroughly enjoyed a good kick ass straight-from-the-African bush wildlife documentary. Especially those screened by the Animal Planet. But when my eyes caught the 'Into the Pride' advert a while ago, my own judgments on their lacking of interesting docs were re-questioned.

Having watched its 2-hours premiere not long ago totally blew me away. Couldn't have requested for Dave Salmoni to try any harder than he already had into giving us the perfect insight of one true Africa experience.

It's basically about Dave trying to be the first ever human that can be seen trusted by the lion pride in the Erindi(?) Reserve, Namibia. He was given 6 months to do it. And we're talking about bad-ass lions that have been rejected by other reserves due to them having bad records in charging the safari-styled tourists that visited the park. His mission is to tame them, and make them less aggressive towards the presence of humans. If that fails, they will, err... be killed, sadly.

I know it's hard to grab that culling idea hey. But the public have to understand that it takes millions per annum to maintain a reserve park and that money, majorly, comes from ecotourism. With them behaving badly, there will be no other more-humane way to curb this problem.

Ok, I have gone way beyond reviewing the new series. But you can guess where I'm going with this. I love how they pull this story out. No big dramas, no exaggerations. He started humble on introducing himself to the pride. I have yet to see the remaining episodes but I can tell you now, I'm already banking to buy the DVD set once it's released :)

Oh, have I mentioned? It's also very interesting to see how he is looking more and more like a lion itself after spending months living with them!

For more information on the series, click here.

curious dweller

2010-01-02T02:17:00.006+10:00

i'm pretty sure she's eager to meet YOU! :)

01 01 10

2010-01-01T13:14:00.000+10:00

phew~
how we spent our very first day of 2010.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY NONOT!

it's a shame that Abang, Kak Ngah, Kak Ami & Bajai weren't around.

seeing the world from the boundary of their life opportunities

2009-12-31T22:56:00.006+10:00

one of those much needed short trips.

having a glimpse of how they make a living out of that lil boat keeps me grounded.
not to mention the sight of that old lady begging from boat to boat for any unwanted catches she could have for dinner. her socks were all wet & you can smell hunger dominating.
and the kids, how they don't and possibly never will, get the chance to see the world outside the fisherman's village.

it was December 31st.
and as i look upon all the places ive been to,
the chances ive been offered
and the life experiences ive acquired in 2009 alone,
i bet they dont even get as much of that their whole life in a wrap pun.

and have we been thankful, may i ask?

hello, 2010.

snippets of TIME Dec 21, 2009

2009-12-26T17:04:00.005+10:00

such ignorance.

oh, and this is a good one too.

HOPE-HAGEN

2009-12-23T21:25:00.002+10:00

my lil global warming protesters

Bitching about those same ghostly agreements achieved in Copenhagen last week (the Climate Change conference, in case you live in a cave all these while) would have supported the silver lining purpose of my blog's existence but honestly, this time I choose to bail. I was hoping for more dramatic approaches from those giant co2 producing- countries but they sure are taking their own sweet time so yea;
as reviewers,
that plateau can be sickening.

Nevertheless, it wasnt all junky.

We witnessed more and more people/org/countries standing up for what is right so that itself is already a huge leap into a green-living world :) Seeing how committed our PM is upon the idea of reducing the carbon emission is such joy. I mean, I know it will not make a difference if Malaysia yang ciput ni je beriya cut the emission while other huge (let's talk per square metres now) countries keep on pumping out that heat-trapping greenhouse gas but how we go around tackling the issue deserves some clapping & respect. US and China ikut pleaseeee.

Cewah, apekah Ami. Kate taknak buat review kannn.

And btw kann,
whoever came up with that HOPE-HAGEN,
I AM WITH YOU!

:)

to a more exciting learning year ahead

2009-12-03T01:12:00.001+10:00

counting days :)

two ply

2009-12-01T01:51:00.001+10:00

datang lagiiiiii pleaseee.

home as it is :)

2009-11-30T19:58:00.002+10:00

i love you both!

roasted zoology 15 (updated)

2009-11-30T17:26:00.000+10:00

Fact 15: Meerkats loveeeee scorpions. The more venomous they are, the better in fact. These kiddos have developed a specialized digestive systems that can withstand the venom and in addition to that, make full use of that venom sac, turning it to their precious protein supply!

Catch them on Meerkat Manors at Animal Planet almost all year round. Theyre so cute the production can't bear to stop shooting the social societies :)

Malaysia so far?

2009-11-30T12:51:00.004+10:00

Stunning.

I remember the last time I was back; didnt quite give those layers of crawling mountain walls surrounding Kuala Kangsar enough credit and attention. Having been away for so long and appreciating the nature beauty on other people's land more than that of our own, I feel ashamed of myself really.

And it would be insulting to not blab about our food too. Everyone in the family has been shoveling food into my mouth like there's no tomorrow :D Pick a meal/dessert, SAY IT OUT LOUD or give the lightest hint. Esok confirm dapat punyaaaa. Keep on pleasing my tummy and I'll grow to become a walking balloon soon enough. Hehe.

Familiar faces on the other hand, is what makes Malaysia home to me. This applies everywhere really kan. Should I be abandoned on a deserted island pun would be ok given that my family is there with me. Looking forward to more pillow fights, ice cream crowding, and constant teasing with my 7 wonderful favourite people. Let us all wait for Ayah & Mak to complete our family portrait :)

As for now, I can't wait to meet my girlfriends. I don't know when, but I will. You know I need my girlie dosage. It has been too long!!

note to self

2009-11-13T16:10:00.003+10:00

Mind paddling a lil bit more maybe, Ami?

Sikittt je lagi before M and F get here.
Then you have fun.
But until then, not yet please.

Not now, not just yet.

November 16th, you wait aaaaa.
I WILL BE AWESOME.

Uh-oh.

on Honours

2009-11-05T16:19:00.002+10:00

For You who give me the chance to learn more.

الحمد لله

the strange Wee Quacker

2009-11-04T18:12:00.004+10:00

Have you ever heard of dolphins that can turn their head 180 degrees? Ni bukan by swinging the whole body but just neck-head toleh?
Haaaa how cool kan.

Because they're unfused, the neck vertebrae is flexible so they get to toleh2.

Oh, and people say good things come in a package kan.
Beat this; they have a brain capacity 40% larger than that of humans, andddddd they're pink in colour too!

http://www.bigtravelweb.com/images/amazon-river-dolphin-l.jpg

http://www.sea-way.org/blog/AmazonDolphin2.JPG

Meet the Amazon River Dolphin Inia geoffrensis :)
also known as the Bufeo, Boto, Boutu, Tonina, Nay, Pink River Dolphin, Wee Quacker, Encantado, Boto Vermelho and byk lagi malas nk type dah.

the humble roamers of the sea

2009-11-04T16:47:00.008+10:00

look, and appreciate.

click http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/archive/5/59/20070810162038!Cetaceans.svg for a bigger picture

how diverse is this Order of animal kannn.

one of the courses I take this semester covers topics relating the marine mammals, reptiles and birds. 2/3 of the lecture contents dealt with cetaceans only, and really, we barely even scratched the surface.

my favourite is those Narwhals, always have been.

picture by Paul Nicklen (duhhh who else captures better in the Arctic than him?)

These Arctic whales Monodon monoceros pretty much own the ocean floor of the Arctic. Such stunners with the male donning a beautiful spirally twisted ivory tusk (macam those you see on Unicorn, only that now it's real) on its head. If you watch The Arctic Tale, look out for them.

And now that I have 32 lecture notes on them to read before I kick ass in my exam on the 9th, please excuse me for now :)

bleurgh

2009-11-02T23:46:00.002+10:00

Did I hear you asking how my last day of lecture went?

Not good.
Lecture ended with an inspiring talk by our Craig Franklin 'the North/South Pole guy' at 12pm. Went to the city with Kathy and tried to cheer the sad soul with EasyWay and Krispy Kreme but nahh. Not working.

us and our temporary happiness

I tried to extend the day by working in my glowworm lab until 7pm before Dave gave me that 'grab-something-to-eat-and-get-some-rest-already' look and shuuhhh-ed me out of his precious glowing lab.

After that hati bertambah gloomy....

and gloomy...

and gloomy.

ahaha HAPPY je lah
You have no idea how excited I am for Honours and all the possibilities ahead :)

we're not done learning about the animals yet!

what a beauty

2009-11-02T23:28:00.003+10:00

This picture may appear to you as a cluster of 12 random plots that makes absolutely no sense.

To me, it screams satisfaction :)

A to L are individual records of my baby glowworms' glow intensity over 20 days.
Yes, when I say baby, I mean baby. I'm talking makan bersuap, tidur berteman and panas ber-hydrated here. Hehe.

There are lots of good memories along with it too.
As much as I hate labworks, these cute lil buggers never fail to get me smiling everytime they glow at night.
One word there is to describe;
Subhanallah.

I may not work with them anymore next year coz I've got the koala conservation project on the table.
Then again, I MIGHT. We'll see.

Good thing about them is money flows in for research as their popularity amongst tourist is pretty intense.

roasted zoology 14 (updated)

2009-10-31T23:22:00.002+10:00

Let's talk about dung beetles for once and shovel aside all the other vertebrates I've been mentioning all these while. These amazing, often forgotten creatures deserve as much attention I must say. Dung beetles are decomposers; and what that means is that they are recyclers. One of the very few in the animal community that care enough to recycle the dung every other animals (including us) produce everyday. Without these little fella, the world would be... trust me, you don't wanna know :P

They can be rollers, diggers, burrowers; all in which the dung is effectively recycled and nutrients are made available once again to the soil. Some eat and breed in them, while other acquaintance may just roll them to ball-shaped for breeding purpose.

Point is, without them, the ecosystem would be grilled.

We often talk so highly on the animals that look far more appealing that we forget these mini soldiers. Hence for this month and all the other months in fact, I announce my blog to be dung beetle friendly!
LOL.
What the hell, Ami?

*Second picture is a set up of our pitfall trap, designed to collect dung beetle samples. Data obtained educate us with their species diversity and distribution across different habitat types.

my October 30th

2009-10-29T21:54:00.004+10:00

Today is a beauty.
Instead of driving back home from the glowworm lab at 1230am as I did last night, I found myself showered and fully lying on the bed at 6pm, looking at the ceiling trying to crawl myself into a nap. Failed so screw that. Had my nice dinner still, chatted with my fellow housemates and back here.

Right now I'm feeling nervous. I feel excited yet nervous.

Tomorrow is gonna be important.
Attending the last lecture of my life as an undergrad. I know I'm still gonna be at uni most of the time next year for Honours still but that is a different chapter. I'm thrilled to graduating soon, at the same time hating the fact that I'm not ready to leave this phase of my life just yet.

You must know thou, my lectures are unlike yours. The way I see them is different. As everyone else growl to the thoughts of 50minutes intelligence crap session, mine is equivalent to those story telling bit you thirst for more as it ended.

We study whales and how their muscles dance to them diving for krill.
We look at cheetah and its thousand different gait postures.
We learn how taking one species out of the ecosystem, be it its the smallest learn concerned species of all, can cause a major drama to the system as equally as all the other more prominent creatures.

Point is, I look forward to hearing them, which i see as a bliss when you learn the things you're passionate about. And the fact that I love to ask questions and argue about it makes for a good laughable tormenting lecturers sessions.

So can I afford to have this thing I classify as privilege taken away from me after 3 years of fun exploration?
NO :(

I guess I have to prepare myself mentally.
At least for tomorrow. Everyone turned so emotional and gloomy whenever someone (dumb enough) pointed out 'Guys, this is our freaking last week of lectures!'. What? Can you make our life any more miserable now? Hish.

Or maybe, just maybe.
Skip all those 'preparing myself mentally' crap and crash undergrad's zoology lectures next year every now and then to get my dosage of drug *light bulb blink blink*

So yea, we'll see how my 30th October 2009 goes.

I'll make a scene and cry like hell if I need to. Or channel the sadness to camwhoring with fellow coursemates I know I'll be missing like hell.

I'll make it special anyhow coz that date is gonna stick in my memory case forever :)

saturday encounter

2009-10-29T13:45:00.003+10:00

Kathy and I found this fella, along with another 3 of his friends while we roamed around the rocky shores of Mooloolaba Beach. He fully foamed at the mouth a while after I picked him up. Got me wondering why so I went back and did a lil research.

Apparently he was having trouble breathing in the air.

Crabs take oxygen from the water, through their gills (yes they do have gills), as fish do. As I picked him up, he used the water stored inside his gills to breathe. But he could only do this for a while. The gills started drying out, it became hard to breathe. Crabs will start moving their mouth and gills, trying to pump in water. So when air comes in instead, the remaining water in the gills foams.

A crab's gills are spongy, and it can easily take in water. The air is mixed with whatever water is still in the gills, and foam is produced.

Oh boy, how I didn't know.
Sorry Crabbyyyy for suffocating you!
(and your 3 friends too..)

einstein's prodigy?

2009-10-29T10:58:00.002+10:00

you know you've fallen head over heels for uni when your hair gets ridiculously greasy yet you still feel ridiculously comfortable with it.

oh yea, and greasy promises Dean's List at this point.

fly me to

2009-10-27T18:35:00.004+10:00

Johannesburg.

Seriously ni. And this isnt just for the sake of updating my blog. Haha.

Library's my surrogate home now, and it will be for the next few weeks. Hence until then, I shall be aestivating like those burrowing frogs. Minus the cocoon, please.

åbenbare

2009-10-19T16:23:00.003+10:00

i adore honest gestures

Marine ecstatically explored

2009-10-15T21:43:00.007+10:00

My morning kicked off a far bit too early last Sunday. I was already driving to pick Vivian up from her place at 430AM before heading to uni where the bus was. I wasn't complaining at all. In fact, excited much that I didn't even get a good deep sleep, fearing that I'd miss the bus. Couldn't register one thing in my head thou.

Here it is, my last field trip.
Here it is, my last field trip.
Here it is, my last field trip.

Here it is, my last field trip.

And so the hailstorms were predicted to hit Straddie Island that freaking day. I know kann, that freaking day jugak lah.
We reached the research station at around 730AM, it was raining and you couldn't even see the coastline. So I thought to myself, 'Oh well, perfect. Now we can stay at the cafe and sip coffee and do nothing. Makes a memorable last field trip'. We changed to wetsuits still, hoping that by 8-ish this pouring rain would give us a chance to mingle with nature. And it did :)

As we walked to the boat, the sun started claiming more and more of its territory. The weather stopped being such a bitch, and the water wasn't at all murky. It was intact; a perfect combination for the highest chances to spot dugongs Dugong dugon in the seagrass-bed area. The boat ride for the record was jerkily, intensely distressing in a good way for some reason.

And then there they were.
When you least expected them to surface. So poise they disappeared back down after a peek or two.
'You taggers again'
The girls were busy trying to take pictures that they forgot to let these creatures stun them in awe. What a waste.

We let them roamed around and searched for more. The rangers started the chasing scene upon spotting one, and it didn't take long before three of them jumped off their boat to catch it. We joined them in a blink; the joy screams a celebration of nature and its greatness.

HAH!
I'm not doing this anymore. Point is, we swam with the dugongs and we had fun it was beyond MAD! :)

The humpback whales and the Indo-Pacific Dolphins were just sub-casts that day, with no intense soaking wet moment going on. So yea, maybe next time you beauties get the limelight, lol.

Hate to admit that as much as I love marine fauna and everything, the deep water and that much trepidation that comes with it kinda drag me out of my comfort zone. Looks like I owe myself more serious swimming sessions!

mouth full of words!

2009-10-13T14:27:00.000+10:00

just wait.
:)

Glow

2009-10-10T14:52:00.003+10:00

We are all worms, but I do believe I am a glowworm.

Winston Churchill

Pic & article here.

the need to launch

2009-10-08T23:50:00.004+10:00

the puzzles are finally getting together.
the move doesn't need forces.
that this, this is genuinely explored.
it feels right, somehow.
this time.

thank you.

nature busy flaunting!

2009-10-08T17:43:00.003+10:00

This is ridiculous. I have no idea where to start.

Ok, I am supposed to be updating on my recent field trip but the memories just keep getting the best of me.

So I spent a week at Binna Burra, a campsite far top on the Lamington National Park. It was for one of the 4 courses I take this semester, and sadly is my last overnight field trip as an undergrad. Refused to be taken aback by that, I thoroughly made full use of my stay and experienced a lot :)

The pictures and title say it all. Having 5 different forest systems all coexist with one another, you sure would have anticipated a bloom of animals and plant species. Altho kan, as ravishing as it is, I couldnt help but to compare it with our rainforest diversity in Malaysia, which I can bravely say is far more intriguing and appealing all at once.

I indulged myself with snakes, mostly (trust me, surprisd myself!). It was heaps of fun having the snake-guy Robbie on the trip. He taught me how to approach, tackle & handle them with least threat possible. Most of my other times were spent conducting a project on dung beetles (which you can get to know in roasted zoology on the right), a torturous job but very rewarding in the end.

My darling bit of the trip was definitely the endless hikes. We hiked everyday, on all possible tracks, for many hours, be it day or night. Totally an ecstacy week for me lol. I cant stress more on how wondrous the views were from the tracks we ventured on, that even if I still do have my dSLR that takes really good pictures, I would have ditched it and just sat there absorbing it all. Having been studying nature and all the mounting problems faced by it for quite a while, you know these chances don't come often. In fact we're losing it as we speak. Oh sedihnya fikir.

So yes, there goes it all.
I'm pretty bad at turning visual memories to words but you get the picture.

Next trip would be to Straddie Island again, this time going fully marine; patting dugongs, sighting humpback whales, annoying sea turtles :) I doubt there would be many pictures taken then coz we'll be on boats soaking wet, but you never know. Tiba2 my blog flooded with pictures again kan. Haaa :)

Ok sudah Amiiii.
Bye!

nature's indulgence, literally :)

2009-10-08T17:21:00.007+10:00

seriously.

you can't not miss this place :)

roasted zoology 13 (updated)

2009-09-30T16:49:00.006+10:00

Crocs, like any other big sea reptiles, can navigate the destination they wanna go from miles away. They can also remember their home range and how to get back to that particular place should theyve traveled further for food or... been flown to the other side of the land by some intrigued researchers to see how brilliant they are (yes, one of them was my crazy lecturer). To their amazement, the crocodile who was translocated to the eastern coast of Cape York, Queensland, found his way back to his birth place located thousands of miles away on the western coast in one month! Nobody knows for sure how he did it but we often underestimate their unbelivable ability anyway so thats one wake up call, human! :)

Pictured is of Kwena Gardens Crocodile Farm in South Africa by Zinni. A good commercial business and much to our surprise, have been closely monitored by the authorities to ensure a certain level of conservation still :) Oh yes, they are Nile Crocs, btw.

september wrap up

2009-09-28T15:59:00.004+10:00

I'd like to utilize my space here to wish everyone a very joyful Eid, and that may we have emerged a better person that we were before, having been able to experience another Ramadhan this time around too :)

A lot has happened while I was away. Refer this dulu! Aha, hell yeah I had the vacation I aimed for :)

Adelaide was as fun and welcoming as before. Despite some serious heartbreaking incidents along the way, I still thoroughly felt happiest there. I met more people, and by that I mean fun, full spirited people :)

I will leave for Binna Burra, Gold Coast tomorrow. Been looking forward to this one-week camping since the day I fought to get my ass enrolled in the course. Trust me, you had to go through an interview and a series of emails with the course coordinator to secure your place in that course. Luckily I made the cut.

It has been a roller coaster week so far, and I dont see the pace slowing down anytime soon. Still, here wishing everyone a happy week ahead :) Watch out this space as I will definitely be pumped to vomit all my zoology-related stories once I'm back to civilization. Hehe.

as for now, Brother Lorikeet sends his love!

because im a mad, driven, and fully functioning being

2009-09-11T14:30:00.001+10:00

have you developed your interest to the point that you infuriate people everytime you get carried away talking about it?

have you found yourself so driven about something that you get so upset to how shallow other people's knowledge is about it?

i am right there. at that very position. i dont think ive ever liked anything this intense. the desire to know more just keeps boiling up, and it is as if youre in a competition with your very self to know more, explore more, spread more.

i enjoy constructive conversations, but sadly, that only happens when i am with my lecturers or tutors, in the lecture or lab, or yes, with myself (hence the blog). nobody i know outside that circle showed any interest in how earth works its ass off to sustain us humans. and how stunning this little ball of planet is to be taken good care of.

explains my utter enthusiasm to regular conferences held by scientists here. I’d look forward to all these talks no kidding. things i know for sure i will miss upon returning back to malaysia. i realized here is where i am most content at. here is where, my thoughts on conservation and the world are cherished. people actually seek more. and even your stupidest question gets acknowledged.

for these mixed feellings of concern, worry, and amazement all at the same time, i thank God for everything. wouldnt be feeling this way if it wasnt for Him that made this path easy for me. i mean, zoology hey? how cheap is that degree? ive even got asked what subject did i fail to finally settle on just zoology. thinking about it made me sick, made me cry a lil bit, made me shut them up to how primitive their mindset is. oh, better yet, to how STUPID these bunch of bitches are. dont you just get that some people are just plain weird (if you say so) and loves animals crazily because they do, and not because its the last option due to their stupidity?

then again, who are to be blamed for that? people dont know whats going on. most scientists i know love writing journals, but very few actually communicate. and you could only guess how brilliant their new discoveries are without reading their published papers. what i need the world to have is more thinking talkers, than just mere writers.

i'd love to be there one day, i'd love for people to know more. right now, everyone's just too selfish to care about things other than their family/work/self. if only.

a disappointment is,

2009-09-10T13:38:00.002+10:00

when your propounded, prepared and deeply researched 'Malaysia's Elephant Management Plan' Honours project being turned down by your very supervisor. Your one-year write-up proposal.

God, help me out here.. :(

fly your kite

2009-09-06T18:27:00.008+10:00

clear blue skies, what a rare beauty.
been here three times so far, and i'm still not done just yet.

feel free to click on the pictures for clearer view.

hello, september spring!

2009-09-01T00:10:00.000+10:00

Dear Roo,
I'd like to come up with a 'must-do' every month. I dont know how long this frenzy thing is gonna last but lets try anyway. Just so I dont lose grip of my sanity being at uni round the clock. You keep an eye on me, buddy.

This month, I'd like to have a trip away. Anywhere. Non-study related trip so my days at Stradbroke Island this weekend doesnt count.

See if I can make it hey.

roasted zoology 12 (updated)

2009-08-31T19:59:00.006+10:00

Fact 12: A little something about the lions.

Male and females greet each other not with a handshake but with a rub, which sometimes becomes so vigorous that one gets knocked down in the process. The act is meant as a means of bonding, as lions leave scent markings on each other during the process, similar to how house cats rub up against their pet parents to demonstrate ownership (but hopefully, with less injury!).

2009-08-30T23:37:00.002+10:00

i see spring peering from behind winter.
can you see it?

Not being able to see Him but fear still

2009-08-25T06:29:00.005+10:00

Very often that I wonder.
What made my dad so eager to catch the jemaah prayer every single time, everyday.
What drives them happily impatient to see God that he would go grumpy if he misses one.
Theyre crazily in love with Allah, it's indescribable.
While we whine that the Imam read an endless surah on terawikh, these people long for more than 8 rakaat it shuts us up right there and then.

I wanna know,
because however and whatever they feel towards Islam as a whole,
I wanna feel it too.

I feel like I'm missing out at the moment. Do you know how it feels? Yea you do your bit as a Muslim. You pray, you worship the God. But you do it in the understanding that you have to, not because you want to. That's the part I'm missing and I hate it. Don't get me wrong, its not that I don't want to, I do, but how I hope to get more spiritually in return, you know? I guess Im just not there yet. Ya Allah..

People say it takes effort to yield that connection. Iman takes constant nurturing. That God isnt gonna award you with it if you've never even bothered to earn one. I talked to a Muslim friend of mine about how I feel once. Where I am as a Muslim. How incomplete I feel. She read me a phrase from Qur’an which says;

"Kamu belum beriman, tetapi katakanlah: Kami telah Islam (tunduk) dan belum masuk keimanan ke dalam hatimu".

Took me a while to understand what it means. While having both is desired, some people just have one but not the other. Iman, the rare pearl, is believing what you believe without any doubt. Islam (in that phrase) on the other hand, which most of us possess, is that belief itself. You worship because you have/forced to, sometimes with much questions to why you do it in the first place. I now realize that you can work on earning the other one to feel complete. I also know that possessing that rare pearl today doesnt promise anything tomorrow. Ive seen people fall in and out of Iman.

Key is, consistency.

In my case, I think I'll baby step for now. I've fumbled a lot the past few years and I hope this time I wont side off the track. Althou I'm not proud to say that I still find it hard to wear the headscarf when I do rock climbing and swimming. Until now. Soon enough, insya-Allah. Soon enough. As for now, I'd like to make full use of Ramadhan, when all gates to heaven are wide open.

Oh Allah, I seek for your forgiveness, I seek for your blessing, I seek for your love.

September Sneak Peak

2009-08-21T14:09:00.007+10:00

Photograph by Robert Clark

I was checking out the NG website as usual to see if they've put up something in advance for September magazine issue when I came across this picture. Manhattan 'Before New York' took place. Brilliant piece. I can't wait to get a copy of that issue on my doorstep :) But have I mentioned, the only downside of subscribing with them is that you'd only receive it mid-month. Earliest. Uh-oh.

August issue is so depressing thou. Scraping the envelope only to have 'Vanishing Venice' printed on the cover of the magazine made me sick. Like, vomit sick. Bloody imperiling my Italy honeymoon reverie. Bloody sea level rise. Bloody global warming. Seriously everyone, get married before Venice tenggelam.

MAYDAY MAYDAY!

These aside, Happy Ramadhan to all :)

*Curious little ground squirrel by Melissa Brandts at http://ngm.nationalgeographic.com/your-shot/daily-dozen?startgallery=116&image=9

You are.

2009-08-20T13:08:00.002+10:00

Such glee.

This post is for you who care enough to learn more.

2009-08-15T00:07:00.007+10:00

This entry is a product of a girl who is excitedly motivated by the latest documentary film she just watched a couple of minutes ago. Flip along, people.

So I've talked a bit on Global Warming beforehand, and I'm not gonna stop telling more here. And yes, this is a real issue to be told over and over again. I just watched 'The Arctic Tale' by the National Geographic Production where it emphasized deeply on the effect of increased global temperature to the lives at the very top of the world, the Arctic. It awed me in many ways possible. Just as I was expecting an adult viewer-targetted documentary presentation, this film adopted story-telling instead; of two most prominent creatures up there, the Walrus and the Polar Bear. Thats a bit risky thou, since Global Warming should be addressed to adults and by using this form of presenting it might not be taken seriously. Oh well, who am I to comment anyway :P

There are a lot I can write here, summarizing the message of the film. Quite surprised myself, at how lacking my knowledge is on the life cycle in the Arctic, given that I do learn about that in classes. Having watched this, I now clearly understand the short message in the video here. People don't seem to see how critical it can get when winter comes late and leaves a lot sooner than it should, in Arctic. So whats the deal hey? Just a couple of degree celcius increased, sikit je ice melt during summer, its not the end of the world kan? Guess what. You're WRONG. Life up there pretty much evolves on the thick sheet of ice thats maintained by the cold temperature even during summer. Polar bear hunts for fur seal on there, seals use the ice as the cradle for the newborn, and walrus spends most of the time basking under the sun on the ice. What do you think happens when ice melts? The sheet gets thinner. It cracks easier, making them now look like patches of ice sheets that can never be able to sustain the weight of a polar bear, let along the walrus yang gabak tu. So the bear gets hungry, the newborn seals are left with no cradle to rest on, and the walrus may get cold and tired and drown eventually. Increased temperature also triggers unexpected weather, such as storm etc. With the wind that speeds up to 80km/hour, the existence of life is definitely put under pressure.

Erk. I can go on and on with depressing facts, but it's really better off for you readers to see the film itself. I know I knowww some people aren't keen on documentary films but trust me, this film is anything but boring. 15 years of shooting the same herd of walruses and those bears, you can't not be amazed with the end product. And hey, if you do fall in love with this film, do watch these too!

Ami's Pick: Must Watch Documentary Films!
1) March of the Penguins by NG
2) An Inconvenient Truth, presented by the former vice president Al Gore
3) Earth by BBC and DisneyNature

The first two are phenomenal. Earth covers the entire earth under 4 different seasons. Great cinematography, but still is not as convincing as the first two. So tengok! Seriously tolonglah :) Hahaha.

Oh oh before I go to sleep too, here are some of the pictures I stole *hehe* from the end of the movie where it has credits and shooting pictures. Pictures that have inspired me so much I even mailed them to my dad despite the yek yek quality. I can almost see myself doing exactly that in 10 years time, insya-Allah :)

Can you see that guy just there with the whale that surfaced to breathe right in front of him?? My god! I'd kill to experience that!

The filmmakers Adam Ravetch and Sarah Robertson are a married couple who share the same passion. One of those 'happily ever after tale comes true', man.

Sea of walruses down there :) :) :) :).

The director himself. 15 years of work, I totally admire this determination.

Ni palingggg jealous sekali.

Ok. Sudah Ami, sudah.
Haha. Good night, good earth.

a parcel for jumanji!

2009-08-14T19:17:00.001+10:00

classic

2009-08-14T18:46:00.004+10:00

the thing with long lost friends is that, theyre so close yet so far.
eventually becoming strangers,
sadly.

i miss you girls.